Typically, a birth mother searching for her child has an easier time than an adopted child searching for his or her birth mother. To begin your search, contact the people who helped facilitate your adoption. These could include a lawyer, an agency, or even a social worker. These people will probably have some records like the adoptive family’s last name, an old address for the family, etc. These people can even help by contacting the family to ask if they are interested in having contact. 

The next step to take in your search process is to research your state’s regulations about adoption records because some states have sealed records to protect the privacy of those involved in the adoption. You can always contact the county clerk to obtain any records outside of the agency that you worked with. After you have obtained as much information as you could, you will want to register with an online reunion registry. Once you have registered, the registry will notify you if your child registers to find you, though he or she may already be registered. In order to be successful with the reunion registry, you will both have to be registered, but it always a good idea to cast as wide a net as possible. As you embark on this search, I want you to remember that not all children can be found, but it is possible. I hope you find success with your search.

Your first step in your search and reunion journey is to register in Adoption.com’s Reunion Registry.

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In order to find your birth parents, you need to start asking questions. Your first step is to ask your adoptive parents about them. For me, it was easy. My parents were willing to share with me anything I wanted to know. First, I asked about siblings. My parents told me their names and I contacted them on Facebook. The next step I took was to ask my siblings about our biological mom. They were unsure about her so I proceeded to find out her name. I was able to obtain my biological mom’s name from my original birth certificate. This led me to find her on Facebook. I contacted her. I now have the ability to set up a time that I can meet her if I choose to. As for my birth father, I’m still trying to contact him.

For me, it was easy to find my birth parents because I have supportive parents who told me that I could search for my birth parents if I chose to. For some, it might not be as easy. If you don’t have adoptive parents who are supportive of you, my first piece of advice would be to find out if it was a closed adoption or open adoption. If it was an open adoption, it will be a lot easier for you to get access to your birth records. The next step would be to contact the agency through which your adoption took place. Once you have the information you need, you can search for your parents in state records. You can also register on adoption reunion registries. There are so many options out there, just find the one that works best for you. 

If you’re looking for something to guide you through this search, you may also want to check out this online search and reunion course. It has tons of information from adoption reunion experts.

Before you start your search, please take the time to emotionally prepare for this. Decide if you would be ready to meet your parents today if you found them. If you feel ready, then start the search. It may be the most rewarding experience you have.

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